I spent yesterday listening and sharing information about cultural awareness. Whilst the talk focussed heavily on the Indigenous Australian community and the injustice that had been done to some of the generations, it had spurred my thinking further to look at where I've come from.
I was born in Jakarta, Indonesia, from a Chinese background. Living as a Catholic Chinese in a Muslim-oriented country was, to say the least, interesting. I had been subjected to subtle racial discrimination - one couldn't walk down the street without a native Indonesian yelling at you that you're a bloody Chinese (yes, thank you, I am aware where I've come from) and to "go back to your own country!" (which, as far as I was concerned, is Indonesia, where I was born in).
I have also been subjected to the prejudice associated with Catholic Chinese, both from the native Indonesian and from fellow Chinese community, my parents notwithstanding. I remembered distinctly coming home from my first day of primary school and being asked how my day was. My reply was, "good. I made a few friends." Which then proceeded to the question of who they were.
Little did I know that what they meant by 'who' didn't require the usual answer one would associate with the question. I innocently told my parents my friends' names, and they drilled me further, asking "what type of people are they?" At this point, I was ready to give them the smart-ass remark of "same like us - you know, one head, two eyes, etc. etc." What they were truly getting at was whether my friends were of native Indonesian origin, or Chinese origin.
Asking this to a six-year-old, my first reaction was: I haven't got a bloody clue. Surely, that wasn't the most pertinent question one would ask to befriend someone else. Secondly: what does it matter?
I was, I realised, at that time, ignorant of the history of what the Catholic Chinese community had gone through in Indonesia; my parents were included in this generation. For as long as they could remember, there had been this underlying tension between the Chinese community (most of them Catholic, most of them well-off) and the native Indonesian community (most of them Muslim, most of them living below poverty line). This tension erupted after the coup d'etat attempt on 30 September 1965, with the aftermath being that every single Chinese living in Indonesia being further ostracised, hunted down, and living in fear.
Stemming from this experience, I can understand (let me stress here that I don't agree with the view, but I can sympathise and understand where this view is coming from) how my parents felt that there are safety in numbers, and stressed each and every single one of their daughters to befriend those who are not of Chinese origin carefully and stick with people of the same race whenever possible.
This view, however, didn't sit well with me, either as a six-year-old, or when I was growing up. I ended up going to a Catholic school. Again, this was where most Catholic Chinese kids went to school, because if you went to the state school (where most native Indonesian were enrolled), some was that bad that the Chinese might not come out in one piece. But, just like any other denominational school, they did take non-Catholic, non-Chinese students, and I made a point of befriending everyone regardless of their race, skin colour, and/or beliefs.
One of the questions in our sharing session yesterday asked what we see as important to 'bridge/close this gap'. To me, it's tolerance; I think you need to accept people for who they are, disregarding where they came from, what they look like, and what their beliefs are. We are all people; all unique; and all of importance. But more than that, I also think that bridging the gap means you need to have the courage to... break the cycle, I guess; to challenge the status quo. Just because this is how a culture has been living for the past how many decades, doesn't necessarily mean that it's the right thing to do. I think there need to be, in each of us, this drive and motivation to extend a hand to those from the opposing sides, those who don't look the same as us, and get to know them for who they really are. Only then we can truly be united.
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